Interpretation of Law
by QuickSilver Knight
Summary: And one for the Akane fans out there(yeeechhh) LOL....


Finally getting around to getting my other fics put under the right writing name...  
  
The characters in this story owned by Viz Communications, and Rumiko Takashai, and others.  
  
Interpretation of Law  
  
It had been three weeks since the failed wedding and the emotional climate at the Tendou residence was still very cold.  
  
Ranma walked quietly a couple of steps behind Akane on their way to school. Just looking at the stiff way she walked along led only to one conclusion. [Awww man... She's still pissed...It's not like it's my fault...Awww, who am I kidding, she blames me for everything.] He felt himself start to slide back into his usual way of thinking and forcibly stopped himself. He walked along a little slower. [Maybe she's right... this time. There's got to be something I can do. It's not like she'd wanted to get married... Did she?]  
  
As they neared the school he could see Ukyo waiting near the entrance. She didn't dare come within arms reach even yet. It was obvious that Akane hoped she would get within mallet range just once. The Furinkan "Let's Date Akane Association" wouldn't come near her either. Somehow they'd managed to figure out that it wouldn't be healthy. At least Kunou was a constant in life. Ranma winced as Akane proceeded to massacre him in record time. [Yep, she's pissed.]  
  
The day seemed to last forever. Even lunch, which was Ranma's favorite part of school, seemed to drag along. He'd finally had enough and skipped the last two hours of school. It wasn't like it'd hurt his grades that much more. He simply wandered around Nerima, not going anywhere in particular. He wanted time to himself to just think. He knew he didn't stop to think very often but he figured he needed to start.  
  
"Going somewhere son-in-law? He heard asked from directly behind him.  
  
"Go away Old Ghoul." He replied, not even bothering to turn to look at her. "I've had it with the games."  
  
So... You're finally going to marry Shampoo eh?"  
  
"No! I. Am. Not. Going. To. Marry. Shampoo.' Each word was it's own sentence. Ranma was finally starting to get mad. Mad at Cologne. Mad at Shampoo. Mad at his father. And, most especially, Mad at himself for letting this all go on for so long.  
  
"You WILL marry Shampoo, Son-in-law. That is the law."  
  
Cologne was starting to sound like a broken record. Always going on about their laws. "That's your law, not ours. You're not in China you dried up pain in the..." Ranma stopped as Cologne smacked him over the head with her staff.  
  
"Don't be rude to your elders, boy. As for our laws... Wherever Amazons go, so go our laws. Our laws always have precedence."  
  
Ranma stood there and rubbed his head for a moment. "They do huh? Anywhere, Old Ghoul? They always have precedence?"  
  
"I said anywhere." She replied.  
  
"Okay..." Ranma turned away and headed back towards the house. "If that's they way you really want it..." He muttered under his breath  
  
***********************************************************************  
  
"And what's my payment for getting you this?"  
  
Ranma ignored Nabiki's question and stared for a moment out her window. "I want the real thing. No fakes, no `almost all there'. A full real item.  
  
"I heard you the first time, Ranma. I repeat, what's in it for me? You already owe me a ton of money. And what do you want that for anyway?" Nabiki was honestly curious as to what use Ranma thought he could put a book to. She wasn't completely convinced he knew how to read.  
  
"I'll know what I want it for when I get it Nabiki... as for your payment. He suddenly turned to face her and his voice dropped a little. "It's not so much what I will do for you as it is what I won't do." As she opened her mouth he shushed her. "What I won't do is press charges of kiddy- porn for all of the naked pictures you sold of me. I won't tell everyone that you fixed the Sumo tournament last month. And..." Nabiki's mouth had dropped open as he told her a list of what he wouldn't do. "...And... one thing I will do. The Pig-tailed-Girl will simply tell Kunou that there's no way that she could ever be with him when there was another who loved him so much..."  
  
"Y-Y-You wouldn't..." Nabiki could only stare at him in horror.  
  
Ranma had a smile that was devoid of all humor. "Oh yes, I would. And we both know how hard it is to convince Kunou that someone's not interested don't we? I figure you shouldn't have to put up with him following you around for much more than... Oh, say a year or so."  
  
Nabiki shuddered at this thought and then decided to cut her losses. "Okay, Ranma, you've got a deal." [What's gotten into him? He's been weird since the wedd...] "The wedding."  
  
"Yes?" Ranma asked. "What now?"  
  
The whole concept seemed to congeal inside of Nabiki's head. "You really DID want to get married, didn't you?"  
  
"I was going through with it wasn't I? I was going through with it, Nabiki." Ranma paused as he opened the door to leave. "As for what we wanted... It's a little late for people to be asking that question isn't it?"  
  
She really didn't have an answer for that question.  
  
***********************************************************************  
  
Ranma sat at the table looking over his notes. [Treat it like a fight] He thought to himself. He sometimes lost a small battle but he always won in the end. He'd taken to eating after the rest of the household. The arguments just weren't worth it. [Two months now and it's still not any better, there's got to be a way to...] His thoughts trailed off as he suddenly realized exactly what he was reading. The quiet of the house was broken by a loud "Yes!" as Ranma began celebrating to himself. [Calm down, calm down, this is going to get ugly before it gets better...] "First things first..." He said out loud as he started jotting down more notes.  
  
***********************************************************************  
  
It was a beautiful Saturday morning. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, a few clouds floated lazily in the sky. [Yep, it's a good day to die...] Ranma frowned a little as the thought crossed his mind. [Oh well... Might as well start the circus.]  
  
The yard had a good sized group of people in it. Ranma had decided to hold the festivities out here. With any luck it would cut down on the damage to the house and dojo.  
  
Ranma stepped off of the porch and motioned for silence. That not working, he finally yelled "Shut up!" at the top of his lungs. That got the desired effect and suddenly everyone was looking at him.  
  
"Okay, first thing is everyone shut up `till I'm done. Things have changed and I'm the one doing the changing." Ranma paused for a moment to punch Kunou right in the mouth. "I said shut up." He grabbed Kunou by the front of his shirt. "Let's handle you and your demented sister first." Kodachi started to open her mouth but thought better of it as Ranma glared at her. "I'll deck you too Kodachi. I mean it. I told you, things have changed. Ranma released Kunou and started to pace around. Everyone was watching Ranma as if he'd suddenly grown a second head. This was NOT a Ranma that they had ever seen before.  
  
Suddenly Ranma turned towards Kasumi. "Do you have them ready Kasumi?" he asked nicely.  
  
"Yes Ranma." She replied holding out two large pots of water.  
  
Ranma turned back towards the Kunous who surprisingly hadn't moved yet. "Okay you two morons. Watch closely. Just shut up, listen, and watch. I'll use small words so hopefully you both can understand. I went on a training mission with my Pop to Jusenkyo in China. Are you with me so far? No, don't talk, just nod your head. Right. So anyway, these pools are cursed. If you fall into one of these pools you turn into whatever drowned in the pool whenever you get hit with cold water. You still with me? Good. Now watch. Kasumi... I you would please." Ranma pointed towards his father. Six transformations later the Kunous were finally starting to grasp the concept. "It's involuntary. That's not to big a word for you is it? Good. Yes, hot water makes you turn back to your real form. Notice I said form... It only changes your form not your personality or feelings." [Well... sorta, but they don't need to know all of that...] "Okay, have you got that concept down? Good. Now watch... Kasumi, please?"  
  
Kasumi poured some cold water over his head triggering the transformation. Then she poured Hot water over him. It took awhile but the Kunous finally got the idea through to them that Ranma and the Pig-Tailed-Girl were the same person.  
  
"I'm still me on the inside, see?" At their hesitant nod Ranma-chan pouted, and then winked at Tatewaki. She pursed her lips at him "Still want a kiss now Kunou?" She asked in a husky voice. At his shudder she smiled and then turned to Kodachi. "And don't you be getting any ideas....Male or female I'd never touch you, you crazy bitch."  
  
Everyone was shocked at this comment coming as it did from the usually mellow Ranma. No one could believe he'd actually told Kodachi off. "Now get out of here and leave us alone. I mean it this time. If you rationalize this away and come back after me again..." Ranma's voice trailed off. "Well...The consequences will be your own fault."  
  
The siblings left silently in a state of shock. Ranma could only hope that he'd shocked them enough to keep them away.  
  
Ranma wiped his hand across his forehead. [Whew... two down, two to go.] "Ukyo..." Ranma turned towards his oldest and best friend.  
  
"I don't care if you're cursed Ranma. It doesn't matter to me."  
  
"I know U-chan, that's what makes you the hardest for me..." She winced at hearing this.  
  
"You're my best friend Ukyou, and I do love you..." She started to beam at this but stopped as he continued. "But not as a husband should love a wife." Tears started to well up in her eyes as she slowly shook her head, trying vainly to deny what she was hearing. "I will always love you Ukyou, but only as a friend." Ranma lowered his head unable to meet her eyes any longer.  
  
"B-But my dowry..."  
  
"I've tracked it down, Ukyou." Ranma said quietly. "Pops will be paying for the return of it. Won't you Pop?" It wasn't a question and Genma realized it. "You're paying if I have to sell you to the zoo. Got it, Mr. Panda?" Genma started sweating as he realized that Ranma meant it. One look at his wife convinced him that he'd get no support from her in his defense. In fact, from the look in her eyes it appeared that she was willing to help Ranma sell him to the zoo.  
  
"I'm sorry Ukyou, it's the best I can do." She stood there crying silently, trying to deny what she'd heard but she couldn't.  
  
[And then there were two] Ranma was genuinely sorry that he'd hurt Ukyo but the insanity had to stop and he was the only one who could stop it. [Growing up sucks.]  
  
"Akane..." Ranma started and then faltered. Looking into her eyes he really hated what he was about to do but hoped that she would someday understand. "Akane... I L-L-Like you a lot. I have for a long while now, but I couldn't make myself admit it. Even to myself. I'm sorry that our wedding got ruined." He continued as Genma and Soun started to dance around and Cologne started to glower. "But, Shampoo and Cologne are never going to give up. Sooner or later you'll get hurt and it'll be my fault. I can't deal with you getting hurt. So I'm gonna marry Shampoo. Today."  
  
Akane couldn't believe her ears. First Ranma had actually admitted that he liked her, and would have married her, and now he was going to marry that Chinese bimbo. She reacted in her time honored way and proceeded to pound Ranma with her mallet. At least that's what she tried to do. Ranma calmly stopped the blow and removed the mallet from her hands. "Trust me, Akane." He whispered to her. "Just once in your life believe that I know what I'm doing."  
  
Shampoo on the other hand, reacted joyously to the news. She had always known that she would win out over the violent kitchen-wrecker. She also understood now why Ranma had not wanted Mousse to be here today.  
  
"So, what does it take to get married Mother-in-law?" Ranma asked while everyone else in the yard was stunned senseless.  
  
"It's a very simple ceremony Son-in-law. Even you can do it." Cologne couldn't help but gloat. She'd won. "As a Matriarch and member of the council I could perform the ceremony right now. All we would need is two..." She blinked as Ranma held out two plain gold bands.  
  
The ceremony was very short, just as Cologne had promised. They got to the end just as the shock was starting to wear off of the assembled group.  
  
"That's it then, right?" Ranma asked. "We're married and I'm an Amazon now?"  
  
"Yes, you are truly my son-in-law now." Cologne answered smugly as Shampoo glomped onto him extra tight.  
  
"Good." Ranma said as he suddenly pushed Shampoo away from him. He stripped the ring off of his hand and threw it at her feet.  
  
"Wife," he intoned formally, "I challenge you to divorce."  
  
"WHAT!!???" Was the collective comment that came out of everyone's mouths? Everyone except Soun that is, who promptly fainted from the multiple shocks to his system.  
  
"It's your law Old Ghoul. You're the one who said that your laws always take precedence wherever there's Amazons. It says in your own Book of Laws that, and I quote: `At any time either member of a marriage, being honestly unhappy with the marriage, may challenge the other for divorce."  
  
Nabiki could only stare at Ranma in awe. She'd read the Book of Laws, slowly, granted, as her Chinese wasn't too good. She'd even read the section that Ranma was quoting two or three times. It's just that she'd never taken it to the same conclusion that Ranma had.  
  
"T-That not what law is for..." Shampoo stammered out completely flustered. She'd never expected this from Ranma and by the look on her Grandmother's face, neither had she.  
  
"It was meant to stop unwanted marriages. This marriage was unwanted... by me."  
  
Ranma stopped talking and looked Cologne square in the face. "And if you attempt to interfere in ANY way I automatically win and you are outcast. Isn't that so, `Respected Elder'?"  
  
"R-R-Ranma..."  
  
"Be quiet `wife'." Ranma snarled. You've drugged me and people I care about, threatened Akane, ruined my wedding, insulted my family, and came real close to injuring my Mother. Did you rally think that I would love you for that? You got your marriage, you keep your precious Amazon honor. Now I get my divorce. Do you accept the Challenge Shampoo, or do you simply accept the divorce?"  
  
Shampoo had no choice but to accept the challenge. She simply nodded her head and went to pick up her Bon-bori. Tears were falling steadily down her face as she squared off against him. She'd seen her dream come true, only to have it turn into a nightmare.  
  
Cologne could only stand of to the side and fume in silence. She had been out thought and outmaneuvered and she hated it. There was nothing she could do, her own laws prevented her from acting.  
  
Ranma, for his part, was doing his best not to look at Shampoo's tears. He hadn't wanted it to be this way but they'd left him no choice.  
  
The fight took longer than expected because Ranma kept trying to find a way to subdue Shampoo without really hurting her. Shampoo was fighting for her dream but knew deep down that she just couldn't beat him. Finally Ranma got inside her guard and hit some pressure points, causing Shampoo's entire right side to lock up. As the Bon-bori slid from her nerveless fingers she knew it was over.  
  
"Will you yield Shampoo? Come on, you know you can't win."  
  
Stubbornly, she shook her head. She may be defeated but she would never surrender. Ranma just looked disgusted as he nodded. "Fine then..." He stepped in and knocked her out with one well placed blow.  
  
Immediately he turned to Cologne. "This was your fault Old Ghoul.... You have no one to blame but yourself. You pushed the issue. There is my ex-wife. Take her and leave. Never darken this house with your presence again." Ranma quoted the law carefully, not wanting to screw things up this close to the end.  
  
She had no choice. Cologne looked...lost. After a long moment she splashed Shampoo with some water and slowly carried the bedraggled kitten away. For the first time since he'd known her Cologne actually moved like an old woman.  
  
Ranma slowly turned around and headed towards Akane. "Uhmmm... I... Uh...Look, I know I'm used goods now... but do you think you could consider marring me?"  
  
He looked her in the eye and said the three words she'd always wanted to hear.  
  
QuickSilver Knight  
  
Author's Notes: Maybe it's OOC for Ranma to act this way... I don't know. Eventually we all have to face certain facts about our lives. As Ranma said `Growing up sucks'. Sometimes pressures will build and we have to find a way to deal with it. This is what I get for a Fan-fic when I'm on a plane for 16 hours from Korea after dealing with my ex-wife and drinking to much. 


End file.
